A Journey Through Unemployment part 4

(to see previous posts, click on the unemployment label to the right)

During the last few weeks I've been blogging on the topic of unemployment.  As I read over my past posts I get emotional, and frustrated as I rehash such a difficult year, yet I'm thankful for how far we've come.  I also feel like I have left out so many things I wanted to say, but realize I may never be able to adequately write about all we that went through.

That being said, I wanted to discuss some of the struggles we experienced on our Journey.  We had faith, emotional and marriage struggles.  I must admit that our biggest struggle was getting to a place in which we fully relied on God.  A place in which we quit saying to ourselves, "when you get a job _______." 

We realized that we had to live each day and quit worrying about tomorrow.  We had to take each day as it came and pray for God's strength to get through it.  We had to accept our new "normal". Sometimes this was easy, but most times this was very difficult. 

I think we had in our minds that the Journey would only last a short time.  When we hit 3 months, we thought ok, maybe 6 months.  Then at 6 months, we thought surely any day now.  Then it hit me one day that it could be a year.  Luckily, God gave me a scripture one day that I never thought would be applicable to our situation.   

James 1:17
"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above"

I've used this scripture before, but always in referring to our children.  However, on that particular day, God was telling me that Kyle's job was a gift.  He was going to give him that gift in his own timing.  I had never thought of employment as a gift, yet on that day I did.

I began to dive into God's word and focus on being the most supportive wife I could.  The best mother I could, and most of all, I began to strengthen my walk with the Lord.

Unemployment took a huge toll on Kyle emotionally and it wasn't always easy for me to be his cheerleader when he needed it.  I was exhausted all the time from working and taking care of a family (praise you full time working mommas). I wasn't always the example of Christ's unconditional love.  However, God got me through it.  The more I took time to be still and truly listen to God speak, the more it seemed I could handle.

The scariest struggle we faced was the toll this journey took on our marriage.  While I don't feel this is the place to expose those personal details, I will say that it took awhile for me to understand why God would allow us to face such a journey while our marriage was so very brittle. 

We were thrown into this journey in which we had to figure out how to work together.  All of a sudden we were together 24 hours a day.  We had to determine our roles in this new "normal."  Small things such as who was going to make dinner became situations of resentment and dispute. 

Learning to figure out these new roles, learning to divide responsibilities and learning to humble myself was not easy.  God had to do some major work in my heart and praise him for getting me to listen!

Next week, I will finish this series with our blessings and where we are today. Let's say you may be surprised at where God has us now!